Chapter 3
VOLUME 3 - THE LIGHT BEYOND THE DARKNESS
file 03: grudge (TRANSLATION NOTES)
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1
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In the morning, Haruka visited Yakumo’s secret hiding place .
She was wearing the necklace she had received from Yakumo yesterday, of course . She wanted to see how he would react .
That said, the fixture that connected the chain of the necklace she had brought home had broken, so she couldn’t wear it as it was .
She just went and switched it with a leather cord from another necklace she had at home .
She thought it matched pretty well .
Yakumo was sitting in the chair he always did with his bedhead and sleepy eyes as usual, and he said, sounding like a fizzy drink that had gone flat, ‘You again?’
It wasn’t just his words – not even his expression changed . He didn’t notice even when she tried .
'You look sleepy as usual . ’
Though she felt disappointed, Haruka sat down across from Yakumo .
'I’m busy . ’
'I can’t tell . ’
'There’s somewhere I have to go after this . ’
'Really . Even though I thought I’d keep you company since you were free . ’
'It’s the opposite,’ said Yakumo in the same tone of voice, and then he slowly stood up .
So he really was heading out . Haruka was going to give up when Yakumo called out to her .
'Will you go too?’
'Go where?’
She asked that, but the truth was it didn’t matter where .
Since Yakumo had gone out of his way to invite her, of course she would go .
'The continuation of the case . There’s something I have to investigate . ’
Ah, so that’s what it was –
That case wasn’t finished yet . Since she had been entrusted with the diary, she had a duty to see the case to the end .
'Of course I’ll go . ’
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They walked from the university to the station, took a cab and walked another fifteen minutes .
When they reached the apartment they were aiming for, Haruka was covered in enough sweat to warrant a change of clothes .
Yakumo talked the manager into unlocking the auto-lock and lending them the key to the roof of the apartment . Then, they took the elevator up to the seventh floor and took the stairs up from there to the roof .
There was no railing or fence – the edge was just a little bit taller, like it had been folded back .
Haruka stood in front of that edge and narrowed her eyes .
She had an unbroken view of the town, cutting through the mountain like a miniature garden .
When she looked at it like this, it didn’t feel like anybody lived there .
A scene with only buildings lined up inhumanly and irregularly . However, many people’s emotions existed there .
Before Sawaguchi Rika-san jumped from this rooftop, what did she feel –
With his hands in his pockets, Yakumo jumped onto the highest edge . It scared Haruka to look at him .
'Why do you think she jumped from here?’
Yakumo spoke to the air .
'Because she had decided to die…’
'Correct . That was not an impulsive decision . She had decided to die with a strong intent . ’
'Why do you think that?’
'Her family lived on the fifth floor of this apartment . If it had been an impulsive decision, she would have jumped from there . ’
'I see…’
'However, she didn’t do that . She purposefully went up the stairs, somehow opened the locked door to the rooftop and stood here . ’
It was just as Yakumo said . In order to come here, she would have had to borrow the key from the manager . That would take a lot of effort . It didn’t feel impulsive – it felt planned .
Yakumo looked up at the sky .
Haruka looked at the sky in the same way . A clear blue sky, discrepant with the situation, spread out above them .
The clouds carried by the wind looked like waves .
'Is there some meaning to this place?’ Yakumo said, still looking up at the sky .
'Maybe it has some special memories . ’
'That may be it . She might have come here in her pain to be soothed rather than to die . ’
Yakumo turned his gaze to the town that spread out below them . His eyes seemed incredibly sad .
Yakumo didn’t often put his own feelings honestly into words, so his eyes did a surprising amount of talking for him .
'So you really were still here,’ said Yakumo as he turned around .
He was looking directly behind Haruka . Was someone there?
Haruka turned around, but she couldn’t see anything . She turned back to look at Yakumo for an answer .
'Sawaguchi Rika-san, yes?’ said Yakumo .
Oh, so she came here?
That was what Yakumo saw .
After a silence, Yakumo jumped off the edge and slowly started walking .
He passed by Haruka and proceeded straight forward, towards where Haruka thought Rika was .
The photo of Rika she had seen at the altar came up in Haruka’s mind .
When she was in the photo, she had been about the same age as Haruka and she had smiled really happily, showing her teeth .
Haruka couldn’t feel any shadow of death from it .
What sort of expression did she have here now?
Haruka followed Yakumo’s back with her gaze . Even though she couldn’t see her, Rika was in front of that gaze .
'Let’s put an end to this already . ’
Yakumo spoke in a gentle tone, like he was speaking to a child .
'Death won’t bring release,’ Yakumo continued .
The cry of the cicada sounded frightfully loud .
Because of the heat which scorched her skin, sweat came down from her forehead and dripped from her chin to the concrete .
'Stop already!’
Yakumo’s voice drowned out the cry of the cicadas .
For a while, Yakumo stood as still as if time had stopped, but finally, he gave up and shook his head while looking down .
'It’s no use . As I thought, my voice won’t reach her . ’
'What do you mean?’ asked Haruka, who couldn’t understand what he’d said .
'It looks like I really will have to have him exorcise her . ’
After saying that, Yakumo took out his mobile phone .
By him, does he mean that that exorcist we met before –
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2
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Gotou visited Hata’s hospital . He was sipping tea in his usual heedless manner .
'You look really tired . ’
'I don’t enjoy my work as much as you enjoy yours, old man,’ said Gotou as he handed Hata a memo .
It was the one Yakumo handed to Ishii yesterday . This should have been Ishii’s job, but he couldn’t come since he was busy elsewhere .
Honestly . Kicking the face of the chief’s daughter – there was a limit even to clumsiness .
Thanks to that, Ishii was being wrongfully doubted and was probably strictly restrained right now, even though he had gone to help Makoto .
'What is this?’ asked Hata, looking at the memo with a complex expression on his face .
'I want you to collect the items on that list . And make it fast . ’
'What are you going to do once you’ve got them?’
'I want to ask that myself . ’
Gotou crossed his arms as he tossed out that comment .
Hata brought his face closer to Gotou’s and looked at him with cloudy eyes, as if he were tasting him . It was creepy . Did Hata want to autopsy him?
'You should take some time off,’ said Hata, finally letting his face muscles go slack . He spoke gently, like he was looking out for his kid .
'What are you saying all of a sudden?’
'I’d thought of saying it before, but you’re not suited to being a detective . Why not take some time off and think about it?’
'Huh?’
Not suited to being a detective, he says –
Nobody had ever told him that before, and the thought had never crossed his mind .
'It hurts to look at you . You’re rebelling against the police, an organisation you can’t win against, and you empathise with the victims of each of your cases and your anger just explodes . It’s like you’re hurting yourself . ’
'I’m not that masochistic . ’
'Then why are you blaming yourself? You’ll just be worn out if you keep putting the burden for everything on your shoulders even when you could just let it go . ’
'Mind your own business . ’
'Why are you still a detective after all that?’
Damn this perverted old man for saying the same thing as Yakumo .
Do I look like I’m suffering that much? They’re wrong . I’m not suffering . Reason being –
'I just rebel against the organisation because I find it frustrating . You say I empathise with the victims? Of course I do! If you asked me, it’d be stranger to look at them like a bystander!’
Gotou talked at length in his agitation .
He wasn’t trying to look good or anything – that was how he really felt .
Hata sighed like he was tired of Gotou . What’s with that look of pity? Gotou didn’t have the right to have people look at him with pity .
Most victims were angry at their assailants, but they couldn’t let it out . Sawaguchi Rika was a good example .
She had even taken her life because of all that she suffered .
Gotou couldn’t silently watch that . That was all .
He didn’t know why . That was just the sort of person he was .
'Well, fine . All I have to do is prepare the items written on here, correct?’
'Does it look like it’ll work out?’
'I won’t be able to do it by myself, but nothing looks like it’ll make for a wild goose chase .
'I’ll come again this evening . ’
After saying that, Gotou left the room .
The previous case and the current one with Sawaguchi Rika . There had so much happening lately that he might have been lost in thought, which was unlike him .
It was the end for Gotou though if even this old geezer was worrying about him .
There was no point dwelling on it . He just had to work now .
Gotou left the hospital and got into the car he had parked in the parking lot when his mobile phone started ringing .
It was from Yakumo . There were a number of things he had to tell him, so the timing was perfect .
Yakumo spoke without even greeting him first .
He was the one who was always complaining about how Gotou didn’t have good phone manners . Well, conversely, it would feel creepy if that guy greeted him politely .
'Yakumo, we can’t treat this lightly . Makoto was assaulted last night,’ said Gotou .
'Shut up!’
It was just as Yakumo said . He might have been the one treating the situation lightly .
He regretted not sending her all the way home .
'She’s in hospital . It appears that her head was hit, but she’ll be fine . Seems like the perp was wearing a mask, but there was a message which said, “Don’t stick your neck in any more than this . ”’
He left out how Ishii had kicked Makoto’s face . If he told Yakumo, he’d tease Ishii until he fainted . Right now, the guy was as depressed as if he had seen the end of the world .
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